Dear Santa,
Christmas is here along with all the holiday travelers and I've been working sooo hard lately (sort of) that I think I deserve some new office goodies. And thus I present my
Front Desk Christmas List.
1. A new fax machine.
I know what you're thinking and yes, people still send and receive faxes. Dont ask me why. But I dont know if you've noticed but the one we have in the back is a little worse for wear. Its literally being held together with scotch tape. And it jams very easily. Its old and slow and pretty much a pain in the ass. We need a new one. Maybe it could be one of those "new fangled scanner/ fax/ copy machine all in one thingamajigs". Also, we could use some more scotch tape.
2. A new countertop
The countertop we have is exactly 12 years old. Its a P.O.S. The laminate has detached from the wood and there is currently a bow in the middle causing office supplies to slide slowly away from one's reach. This is unacceptable. I'm not asking for marble, just something that lays flat? Maybe?
3. Scissors
We have an office scissors bandit. I'm sure he or she is right there on your naughty list but nonetheless they are relentless in their klepto tendencies. Scissors are very useful for all sorts of things. Like making snowflakes to hang in one's window or cutting up plastic six pack rings to help save the dolphins and sea turtles. Dont you care about the sea turtles Santa? Of course you do.
4. New computers
For the love of God, writing this blog is a hefty task for this dinosaur. Or all three of these dinosaurs. I have a better computer at home and you dont even want to know my hourly wage. It would make you cry. Our computers cant handle most of everything and every day more and more websites have the ability to freeze them. IBM doesnt make pcs anymore just so you know. The money I would pay to take a crowbar to these things. I'm oh so tempted to go "fishing" for viruses but karma is a bitch so yeah.
KTHXBAI - Madame Midnight
(oh and merry christmas santa)
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